Gift of LOVE

Let the world stop turning,

Let the sun stop burning,

Let them tell me love's not worth going through,

if it all falls apart,

I will know deep in my heart,

The only dream that mattered had come through,

In this life I was love by you....

Thanks Baby, this purse matches to my limited edition hand bag. Surprise me more, I'll be delightful... ;) 

Tribute to Allahyarham Mohamed bin Mohd Yusof...

This entry is dedicated to my beloved ABAH, Mohamed Darbie bin Mohd Yusof. I really want the memory to remain in my heart, mind and soul forever. It took 2 weeks to finish this entry as I will cry while typing this. Man, it’s so hard…here it is.

It’s almost 13 years, Abah left me when I was 17 years old. I was still a vulnerable child who needs the protection of her father.

When I was a kid, I still remember that Abah will bring me around town with his motorcycle PS 972 every evening. I’ll sit in front of the motorcycle and he will buy me chocolates, ice-cream and my all time favorite, Super Ring.

I’ve started my pre-school since 4 years old. I can read and write when I were 3 years old. He will send me to school and fetch me from school every day and that was his responsibility.

And sometimes he will teach me to play badminton in front of our house. Abah is a very over protective dad. When I was in primary school, he’ll make sure that no one will hurt or disturb me at school and even after school.

Abah sent me to Sekolah Agama and he said he wanted me to have balance in life. There was one day, someone took my color pencil. He bought me a 24 Luna colored pencils and my friend took one of it. I was crying and he went to school the next day and talked to the girl’s grandpa about the color pencil, surprisingly, I’ve got it back!

Another incident was that, there were 2 Chinese boys watching us played the badminton. He scolded the boys by saying that “Kenapa u org tgk ank saya? Mau kacau ka?” During that time, I was just 10 years old!!

When I was in standard 5, I’ve been appointed to be Peers Committee. Sometimes my classmates will call me at home and asked for my advice.  While I was on the phone giving my peer an advice, he will listen to my conversation from the other phone. After I’ve hang up, he said “Tak sangka anak abah pndai bagi advice love”. About the phone thingy, he did hide the handset so that I won’t always on phone talking to my mates without studying or doing my homework. And if a boy called me at home, he will say “Kenapa nak kacau anak saya after school? Kalau nak tanye kerja sekolah ke ape ke,tanye time sekolah je”.

Every day when I am coming back from school he will check my school bag if there’s any love letters from the boys at school. He will read all my mails before he passed them to me, well, in case if the mail is from a boy.

I was quite an active students and my father is always being invited to attend the students award as I’ve got most of the prizes and every year he needs to sit in front of the stage and he said “Bangganye abah dapat ank yg talented. Belajar pandai, berlakon pandai, nyanyi pandai, menari pandai, berdebat pandai, bersyarah pandai, berpidato pandai, 3 bahasa pulak tu. Bersukan pun pandai. Asyik abah je tiap2 tahun dok depan mesti org lain jealous”. He was so proud of me and EVERY time I walked on the stage, he will look at me with his teary eyes.

Abah is an adventurous person. He likes to ride his bike to the dangerous path or small bridge and he will be busy looking around while smoking during his ride. There was one day, when we were on the bike with my mother, the bridge was slippery, the bike skidded and we felt down. Abah was a skinny and tall person. He tried so hard to avoid Mak and me to fell down from the motorbike. He was using his leg and it was bleeding and his skin was tattered. Pity Abah but he just bears his pain and we immediately went to the clinic. The point here is, he’ll make sure that we are safe even he’s hurt.

I still remember, when I recite an Al-Quran, he will listen and correct me when I am wrong without looking at it (he memorized some of the Surah). The reason he taught me to read Al-Quran at home is because, I’ve been beaten by Ustaz because I can’t read the Al-Quran upside down (I guess the Ustaz is psycho). He was so angry and scolded him by saying “Saya tak pernah jentik pun anak saya ni”.

Abah pampered me by buying me prizes every time I’ve won something or got 1^st place in my class. But of course he bought me the presents that he can afford to buy. When I was in standard  4, I’ve got 1^st place in class and best student in Maths, Science, English, Agama, Malay and Music, and he bought me 7 different prizes for 7 different categories that I’ve won. I was so happy! And one of the present was badminton racket.

I was in standard 6 preparing for my UPSR. Abah will wake me up every day at 4.30 am and will accompany me to study while he was smoking at the couch. I am also sharing his work station so that I feel comfortable to study and doing my homework.

When I was in Form 1, Abah realized that he spoilt me so much. So he sent me to hostel for me to be independent. I was crying and without my knowledge, I didn’t know that I was taking Arabic subjects for my PMR papers. He seldom visits me at the hostel. At first I wonder why. I missed him and Mak so much and I called home every day. While my best friend’s dad is always come and visits my friend which he was a good friend to Abah too. Pakcik Usop (my bestfriend’s dad) will provide me with food (biscuits, drinks and all) during his visits and said that it was from Abah, which I know Pakcik Usop who bought it for me and not Abah. One day, I asked Abah why he seldom comes to my hostel and visit me like Pakcik Usop or at least bought me a food? He said “Dalin, Abah takde duit nk dtg slalu. Abah kadang2 kena pinjam duit dr pakcik mintak dia belikan makanan. Abah taknak Dalin tak makan atau tgk budak2 lain semua mewah dgn makan tp Dalin tak. Abah mintak maaf…” I was crying the whole night …..

I was a prefect since I was in standard 1 until form 5. When I was in form 3, I need to attend the survival course for the prefects. When he heard that a guy lifted me up, he came to the school and met up with the Principle. He wants me to quit from school and send me to another school near the house. During that time, I didn’t even take my PMR yet and the Principle tries negotiating with Abah to at least let me take my exam first then transfer school. Abah agreed provided that his daughter will never be touched again with any guys.

Then Abah found out that I have a boyfriend. He again came to the hostel and met up with that boy and giving him some advices “ Pakcik tak kisah nak berkawan. Tapi jgn buat perkara tak senonoh. Berkawan berlandaskan agama ada batas2….” And the advices went on and on and on…. Mak and me just smile.

As promised, Abah took me back to my hometown and he’ll make sure that he will send and fetch me to anywhere that I go. School, tuitions, sports, you name it.

There was one day, I was late after school. Normally my class finished at 1.15pm. It took about 5 minutes to go down the hill to Abah’s car. On that day, I was late for 2 minutes because on my way down, I’ve chit chat with one of my teacher about our Rekacipta competition. Abah was so mad and said “I was an Army. When I said 1.20pm, you have to be here sharp at 1.20pm. Understand?” Abah will speak in English when he’s angry to me. I was shocked but I’ve immune to it.

When I was in form 5, Abah was taking care of by my brothers and sisters. He was admitted to Hospital Tuanku Ampuan Rahimah. I, during that time was busy with my school activities and preparing myself for SPM. It has been 2 weeks I didn’t meet up with Abah. I stayed with my cousins and her family.

I still remember, Abah asked me to clip his nails but I refused because I’m scared that I’ll cut his fingers. He just kept quiet and did it by himself.  And that was the last time I’ve seen him.

14^th March 1999, I was on my way to see Abah as I miss him so much but we couldn’t find our way and reached the hospital at 6.31pm. Surprisingly, there were most of our relatives at the hospital. The moment I’ve reached Abah’s bed, he’s already passed away at 6.30pm!! I was 1 minute late to see Abah and I burst into tears like….forever.

Abah owh Abah, I miss you so much. If only you are here you will make sure that me and my sisters are safe and happy. I know you were an army, you are fierce but soft-hearted, and you are easily angered but loving. Your advices to me are so soft, deep and soothing to my ears. “Dalin ni ank Abah yg paling degil tp Abah tau Dalin dgr ckp Abah”. Abah loves to compliment me,pampered me and left his memory with me forever…the scar on my head (cigarette ember). I love you, Abah….you will always be my HERO.

“Moga Abah ditempatkan bersama orang-orang yg beriman…Al-Fatihah”

Predict the unpredictable...

Sometimes it’s hard to describe in words. Sometimes it’s hard to express those feelings. If this thing can be describe into direction then it’ll be from different angles. Hard, tough, solid and we as human should realize that whatever it takes, we should always go back to the basic of ALLAH.

She doesn’t understand what went wrong. She’s the one who’s being claimed doesn’t have a pace to change.  The saddest part is that, she’s sincerely having this pure feelings and the reflection is way too sharp. It leaves small pieces of mirror even to stick it back together; it won’t deflect the same object as the one who looks at it. Since the first day of the new path is being craved, the rainy season is always a matter of choice.

Compromise, confrontation, discussion and communication are only by name which doesn’t come into effect. There’s too much of holes that need to patch up, not even that but the diction of the same language is no more parallel. If it’s the destiny, she would rather choose to cross over the rainbow. Even though she wouldn’t know the other side of the road may be are more obstacles than what she’s having now. By having the strength that is growing in her, insyaALLAH ALLAH knows best for everyone… 

Scriptovia PR Agency

"You have to perform at a consistently higher level than others. That's the mark of a true professional"

Task for the final semester students....ready to rock the real world!!

Feelings...

I miss how we used to talk every minute of every day and how I was able to tell you everything that was on my mind. I miss our conversations

Thought of The Day - 16th Apr 2012

Making decision to have a child - it's momentous. It's to decide forever to have
Your heart go walking outside your body :)

Hubby's Getaway to Mount Kinabalu

On 25th - 27th of March 2012, Hubby and his friend Radzie were having their men's vacation out to Mount Kinabalu. They were having an intensive training before (gym & swim) to gain energy for the preparation. They've asked around of other's experiences & physically and mentally are preparing themselves of any consequences.

According to Hubby, the journey to Laban Rata was not that difficult but the weather was so cold. He kept updating me of his achievement (sending pictures) & he learnt how to be mentally strong. He met a group of Japanese age 60 and above & this was a wake up call to him to really make it to the top. The next morning, Hubby and Radzie started to climb to the top. Although it's another 800m up but the obstacles were way too high.

He was freezing, even he carried a bag of 5kg (took turn with Radzie) but exhaustion was out of mind. Alhamdulillah, Hubby & Radzie made it!! The scenery was awesome and he felt the satisfaction of it. Unfortunately, on the way down, Hubby's felt uneasy with his knees condition. His movement became slower and he felt the shaking  of his knees. However, he managed to come home safe & sound & sleep like a baby. The consequences from this trip, Hubby can't walk properly because of the cramp, his lips are dried & his knees are shaking for almost 2 weeks.

Well, perhaps my story-telling was not that great as to compare to Hubby's story. This is because, it is not my experience. But this will be his starting point to climb for another mountain in future. He promised to bring me to Mount Kinabalu next year, insyaAllah.

Whatever it is, to Hubby, I'm so proud of you!!